By Tarzana Joe



We all just got a lesson

From those folks who make the game work

Have a couple meetings

Then announce you have a framework


They launch a little vessel

Then step back as it goes drifting

Leaving it to someone else

To do the heavy lifting


Start a new bureaucracy

And pass a few more laws

Totally ignoring both

The problem and the cause


The government’s enormous

And its growth just can’t be slowed

Any one that’s tried to

Has been told to hit the road


So if our sober senate’s unprepared to set the tone

I’d like to entertain you with a framework of my own


My plan should get attention for its excellence and rareness

Seeing as it’s based almost entirely on fairness

By reading daily papers you should know it’s not surprising

That just outside the capital, all real estate is rising

It’s only in the beltway loop that unemployment’s rare

And any good Progressive must agree that’s less than fair


Because there’s so much wealth embedded in the institution

I say our central government could use redistribution

My plan is very simple and in it’s essence states

That cabinet departments should be shipped out to the states


All those hefty sal’ries can be moved to your community

Denying the nefarious one target opportunity


Then everyone in Michigan would sure be sitting pretty

If we moved Transportation out there to the Motor City


Commerce to Chicago and Defense should move to Texas

So everyone in Dallas could afford a second Lexus.


It’s not exaggeration and it isn’t any joke

It’s just the only way to fix a government that’s broke

It may seem kind of crazy but this is how I figger’

The one thing that it’s good at…is making itself bigger



Tarzana Joe, the poet laureate of the Hugh Hewitt Radio Show, can be heard on air in the 3rd hour of the broadcast on most Fridays. His wonderful poetry can be found at


Please see his new site

Reprint with permission by Tarzana Joe, who can be contacted to pen the perfect poem for any occasion at …see the linked form.